Discouragement, Zombies, & Truth

It’s been a hard few days. Not exactly bad, but hard.

I ended last week completely, mind-numbingly, feel-like-a-zombie exhausted. Then on Sunday afternoon, as I was finalizing preparations to teach a Bible Study lesson on marriage last night (which as a single, is not exactly my area of expertise), I was battling some intense and inexplicable frustration. Then yesterday, as the pace of incoming work was so insane that I could barely keep up and my mind could barely process the cases that needed attention, I was left feeling overwhelmed. And bonus, my fridge died (gross!) and this morning I had an oh-so-fun orthodontist appointment that ended with my orthodontist saying to his assistant, “Stop. This isn’t going to work and we don’t want to hurt her or pop the bracket off or make her teeth any more sore. We’ll just finish it next time…”

In short, I have been dealing with some fierce and pervasive discouragement.

But y’all, in the moments when the zombie-like exhaustion and crippling discouragement have threatened to take over, God has repeatedly shown up (as if He ever left…)!

Not in dramatic or everything-immediately-becomes-so-much-better-and-easier ways, but in ways soft and subtle and full of truth

Through the prayers and assistance of a sweet new friend at just the right time,

Through the constant reminders to pray when I have felt most out of control (just to be clear, that is NOT my typical first reaction, and the conviction in this regard has been poignant),

Through an encouraging Valentine’s Day card from the preschool ministry at church,

Through a thought-provoking and meaningful night of Bible Study despite the prior frustration and feelings of inadequacy, which ultimately led me to wholehearted dependence on Christ (which, ironically, was a huge emphasis in the study in regards to striving for a Biblical marriage),

Through a “Happy Valentine’s Day” text from a dear friend,

And even through a Skinny Mocha from Starbucks.

Yes, the past several days may have been hard and I may have been battling discouragement, but God is faithful and loving and SO good, and by His grace, I am not in this battle alone!

“But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’  Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest on me.”

2 Corinthians 12:9 (ESV)

5 Things

1. I cleaned my bathroom yesterday, and somewhere in between cleaning the sink and the tub (the. very. worst. part. can I get an amen?), I ended up totally distracted by a nail that’s only been on the wall above the toilet for about 3.5 years. I was so distracted by it’s unsightlyness (I think I just made up a word…) that I went and found a spare frame collecting dust under my bed, put a fabric swatch in it (it was all I could come up with in 5 minutes), and hung it on the wall to hide the old nail hole. It may not be perfect, but it looks so better than a blank wall with a nail sticking out of the center!

2. I’ve been studying Genesis 3 (well, technically Genesis 2-4 for context) in depth this past week for Bible Study. And y’all, the Serpent (aka: the devil, Satan, the beast, the dragon, the evil one) is no joke! I have a whole new appreciation for this verse after my studies over the past several days:

“Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.” – 1 Peter 5:8 (ESV)

3. I’m thinking of doubling the photo of the week with a recipe on Friday. Is that cheating?

4. Fun fact: the ceramic fish in the above photo is from the Christmas store (St. Nick Nack’s) in Calabash, NC. My sweet mom got it for me when I first moved into my apartment in college.

5. I discovered Words with Friends this weekend. Oh, dear…

The 2012 Blogging Adventure(s)

As I mentioned here, I’m changing things up a little this year:

1. I have decided to use a new read-through-the-Bible-in-a-year plan for 2012 (the M’Cheyne plan…which goes through the New Testament and Psalms twice and the rest of the Old Testament once). As part of my effort to stay accountable to both the reading plan and to writing, on Tuesday or Wednesday of each week I will be posting a devo thought based on the previous week’s reading {at least for now}. As I have always considered devotions to be the heartbeat and core of this blog, I’m really looking forward to a more systematic approach to the devo thoughts this year, and pray that this walk through Scripture will be an encouragement to you as well!

2. Although I’m technically already a week behind (unless if you count the above photo…), in an attempt to improve in and further my knowledge of all things photography, I will also be doing an unofficial 52-week photo project and posting one photo per week (hopefully on Friday, but that is totally subject to change at this point). These posts probably won’t be super long or wordy (shocking, I know) as they’ll mainly serve to document the photos throughout the year, and I have no rules for myself other than that the photo must have been taken within the prior seven days.

Of course, you can still expect to see recipes and life thrown randomly into the mix here and there as well. Thanks for hanging in there with me and continuing to read this humble little blog…I am so grateful for each one of you!

This Photo

My Dad says I take too many photos of my feet. And he may be right. But hey, Jasmine Star (an amazing and well-known photographer) said just last week that as girls, “This is what we do.” So…

Regardless, I love this photo. Not because it’s technically perfect and not because it’s all that interesting and not even because of the fun Christmas bokeh.

I love this photo because it’s simple, quiet, peaceful. I love this photo because it’s warm and feels like home. I love this photo because it represents life right now.

Christmastime is Here

As I mentioned in this post, decorating the house for Christmas has been a process this year. In years past, my roommate and I have tried to set aside a day or two to get all of the decorating done in one fell swoop. This year … not so much.

But I’m learning to embrace The Nester’s motto, “It doesn’t have to be perfect to be beautiful.” Finished or not, exactly how I envisioned it in my head or not, more-than-I-care-to-count broken ornaments or not, I so appreciate the beauty in Christmas decor …

The peacefulness of watching a Christmas movie by the light of the Christmas tree.

The happy memories of playing with a wooden nativity set while reciting much of the Christmas story from Luke 2 underneath the Christmas tree with my younger brother.

The moments of stillness experienced from simply enjoying the greens, reds, whites, and silvers.

The accompanying wonder and excitement that remind me of the gift, the miracle, the mystery, of the Incarnation of Christ.

Will you join me in slowing down and soaking in the beauty of this season?

These are all of the fun vintage ornaments we found in my grandparents’ attic over Thanksgiving. My grandfather remembered using them to decorate the tree when he was little. I was SO excited that we were able to use them as a centerpiece on the kitchen table.

We have several Christmas plates, but this little square reindeer plate is by far my favorite. It’s just so sweet and simple.

My crazy talented roommate, B, made both the tree skirt and the stockings this year based on some Pinterest finds we fell head-over-heels in love with. They turned out SO well!

The mantel was a challenge to say the least. My rather vague idea of what I thought I wanted ended up not really working out at all (except for the lanterns), but when I remembered that I had the “love has come to walk among us” poster, it started coming together quite nicely.

I even made a wreath out of some of the tree clippings to hang on the mirror.

I hope the rest of your Christmas season is filled with the love, joy, and peace of Christ, the promised One, Emmanuel, God with us.

To see more Christmas beauty, check out one of the following as well:

The Nester’s 2011 Christmas Tour of Homes

2011 Christmas Home Tours @ The Inspired Room

Jennifer Rizzo’s Holiday House Party

Kelly’s Korner: Show Us Your Life – Christmas Tour of Homes

Stepping Back

One of the things I love most about blogging (aside from all the amazing people I get to interact with) is the opportunity it provides for stepping back to appreciate all of the ordinary moments that make up the everyday and to encourage the restoration of proper perspective in the midst of a too-full schedule.

So here’s 10 days (yikes!) worth of all-over-the-place random, photos from my phone, and stepping back…

Around this time each year, I look at my December calendar in the name of preparing for what’s ahead and tend to have a minor freak out moment until I settle into being just plain overwhelmed by the number of parties, rehearsals, and commitments that inevitably characterize this month. Without fail, that moment has come and gone. But after realizing that I had foolishly scheduled almost 10 days in a row of being out of the house every day (for pretty much all day), I did have the foresight to make some adjustments to the schedule where possible. I hate saying “no” to good things that I know will be fun and meaningful, but I find that I’m much less overwhelmed when I slow down enough to have at least a couple of nights each week with no commitments (I call this scheduling “margin” into life…time to be still and recharge…am I the only one who needs this?), so I can at least stay on top of cleaning the bathroom, vacuuming the carpet, and washing the dishes. All things that help me stay sane. At least relatively.

This helped with restoring perspective, too:

“The second coming of Christ will soon be here…Rest in the hope of that day. Work, watch, and look forward – one thing, at any rate, that day will make abundantly clear. It will show that there was never an hour in our lives in which we had our hearts too thoroughly focused on Christ.”

- J.C. Ryle (emphasis added)

I rode with my parents to my grandparents house in Northern Virginia for Thanksgiving. It was a quick trip (we left on Thursday and came back on Saturday), but since I wasn’t driving, I managed to read two books during the travel time. (“Radical” by David Platt and “Heaven is for Real” by Todd Burpo…just in case anyone’s interested.) We had a great time visiting with family, and on Friday, while everyone else was out shopping (which is just not my idea of a good time!), we helped my grandparents clean out old Christmas decorations from their attic, which is where I found these amazing vintage ornaments. I fell in LOVE with them, but no one else seemed to want them, so my Uncle and I divided them up between us and later found out they were my grandfather’s from when he was little. Even better!

Decorating the house for Christmas this year has been a process (and is still in progress), but my roommate, B (who happens to be blogging lots of fun and tasty homemade treats for 25 days of Christmas here) made these awesome stockings since we decided to change up the mantel theme this year. Aren’t they just the cutest???

Speaking of decorating, I know I left you hanging with the whole office re-do. I still haven’t really finished, but I did finally organize the bookshelf, and I really like it!

On Friday morning, I walked outside my back door to find frost all over my car. I didn’t feel like scraping the windows, so after saying “good morning” to my neighbor who was throwing out his trash, I opted to just sit in the car for a few minutes, eat my waffle, and wait for the defroster to kick in. About 30 seconds later, though, my windows cleared instantly as my neighbor had gone into his own car (he wasn’t going anywhere, mind you), taken out his de-icer spray, and sprayed all my windows for me. Totally made my morning!

Of course, ’tis the season for my weeks to be filled with lots of choir rehearsals in preparation for the Christmas concert (which is next Sunday) and for other extra special seasonal services (the Advent / Tree Lighting service is tonight!). And yesterday afternoon, I attended the women’s Christmas tea at church for the first time thanks to an invite from a sweet friend who hosted/decorated a table again this year. There were 81 tables all beautifully decorated by their respective hosts and a message of the hope and peace we have in the gift of Christ. So much fun!

And now, I’m planning to sit on my couch in my favorite fleece pants and enjoy an hour of stillness. I hope you experience some peace and stillness in the midst of this season as well!

Happy Thanksgiving!

I’m thankful for family…who chooses to love me even when I am quite unlovable.

I’m thankful for God’s Word…so. deeply. thankful.

I’m thankful for changed sheets, a freshened kitchen, a clean bathroom, and an organized closet…all in preparation for travel to spend a few days with extended family (though we’ll miss the brother!).

I’m thankful for the shadowy and unclear moments in life…that force me to run back into the light of a loving and faithful Savior who gave all.

I’m thankful for good friends…the kind who you can email in the middle of the day when your soul aches for no reason at all, the kind who you can text a few times and it seems like they’re right there with you, the kind who you can travel to fun places with, and the kind who will accompany you to Sonic at 10pm just because.

And I’m thankful for the third batch of these cookies in the oven right now…making my whole house smell like pumpkin pie spice goodness:

Happy Thanksgiving, y’all!